My Fwb Asked If I Slept With Someone Else
So, this happened. My FWB – let’s call them “Sparky” – hit me with a question. A question that landed with the grace of a rogue bowling ball. It was a simple query, really. Just a tiny, innocent little “Did you sleep with anyone else?”
My first reaction was a silent, internal scream. It was the kind of scream that vibrates your teeth. And then, a very unhelpful giggle escaped. I’m not sure why I giggled. Maybe it was nerves. Maybe it was the sheer absurdity of the moment.
See, the beauty of the FWB arrangement, in my humble, possibly unpopular opinion, is its blissful lack of obligation. It’s a delightful dance. A casual connection. No strings attached, unless you’re particularly fond of that decorative macrame you bought at a craft fair.
So, when Sparky dropped that question, my brain did a little somersault. It was like asking a cloud if it had rained on a different patch of sky. It’s not really the point, is it?
My FWB situation is designed for ease. For fun. For zero drama. It’s the emotional equivalent of a perfectly ripe avocado. Easy to handle, delicious, and you don’t have to commit to a long-term lease on it.
But then, Sparky was looking at me. With those… eyes. The eyes that usually hold a playful glint. Today, they held a hint of… something. Curiosity? Maybe even a tiny sliver of possessiveness? My internal alarm system went off, but it was more of a gentle chime, like a tea kettle softly whistling.
I took a deep breath. I considered my options. Option A: Full, honest, and potentially awkward disclosure. Option B: A vague, diplomatic, and probably more entertaining response. You know which one I chose.
“Well,” I started, my voice a little too high. “That’s an interesting question, Sparky.” My mind was already racing. What constitutes “sleeping with” someone else in the grand tapestry of FWB life?
Does a fleeting thought count? Does a particularly steamy dream? Does making eye contact with a cute barista for a little too long?
Sparky’s eyebrow did a little dance. They knew I was stalling. They knew I was devising a strategy. This is the fun part, you see. The wordplay. The mental gymnastics. It’s like a mini-game within the larger FWB game.
“So,” Sparky prompted, a smile playing on their lips now. They were enjoying this. I could tell. They like my unpredictable nature. Or maybe they just like my ability to avoid direct answers.
“Look,” I said, leaning back. “The beauty of this, for me, is that we’re both free agents. Like solitary explorers charting our own constellations.” I was really leaning into the poetic now. It was a bold move. Potentially a foolish one.
“And if this solitary explorer happened to briefly encounter another star system on their journey,” I continued, gesturing vaguely with my hand, “does that diminish the brilliance of our own celestial meeting?”
Sparky burst out laughing. Success! The tension evaporated like dew on a summer morning. They knew what I was implying. And they, bless their flexible heart, seemed to be okay with it.
This is where I might lose some of you. This is where my “unpopular opinion” truly shines. I believe that in a FWB situation, the question of who else you’re seeing is… often irrelevant. It’s like asking a baker if they’ve used different brands of flour in their day. As long as the cake turns out delicious, does it really matter?
Our arrangement is based on mutual enjoyment and understanding. It’s not a monogamous relationship. It’s not a marriage proposal disguised as a Netflix binge. It’s a straightforward, no-frills, good-times situation.
So, if I happened to have a delightful conversation with someone else? Or shared a laugh over a drink? Or even, gasp, shared a different kind of connection? As long as it doesn’t interfere with my commitment to Sparky, and Sparky’s commitment to me (which is a commitment to our shared fun, not our exclusive attention), then it’s just… life happening.
It’s about being present and enjoying the moment with the person you’re currently with. And if that person is Sparky, then Sparky gets my full, undivided, present attention. The past experiences of my own solo adventures are just that. Past.
My FWB is not my boyfriend or girlfriend. They are not my future spouse. They are my current, very agreeable, companion for specific kinds of fun. And that’s a beautiful thing.
The pressure of answering “yes” or “no” felt so… heavy. Like I was confessing to a crime. But in the realm of FWB, there is no crime. There is only exploration and enjoyment.
Sparky leaned closer. “So, what you’re saying is,” they said, their eyes twinkling with amusement, “you’re a free spirit, charting your own course.”
“Precisely!” I chirped, feeling a wave of relief wash over me. “A cosmic wanderer. And you, my dear Sparky, are a perfectly wonderful destination.”
They laughed again. “You’re something else,” they said, shaking their head. And I think, in the context of our FWB understanding, that was the best compliment I could have received.
Because “something else” means I’m not defined by their expectations. I’m not a puzzle to be solved. I’m a person with my own life, who also happens to enjoy their company. And that, my friends, is a perfectly acceptable, and frankly, rather liberating, way to be.
So, the next time your FWB asks about your other adventures, remember the power of a well-placed metaphor. Remember the freedom of the FWB. And remember that sometimes, the most honest answer is the one that’s also the most entertaining.
My FWB situation is a garden. And gardens, by their very nature, can be open to more than one pollinator. As long as the flowers are still blooming beautifully, why worry about where the bees have been?
It’s a little controversial, I know. Some might call it… scandalous. But I call it logical. I call it the smart way to navigate this wonderful, messy, and often hilarious world of casual connections. So, to Sparky, and to all the other Sparkys out there, thank you for understanding the beautiful simplicity of “what happens in FWB, stays in FWB… unless you want to playfully allude to it later.”
And no, I’m not going to tell you what my actual answer was. That would be revealing too much. And in the FWB world, some mysteries are best left unsolved. For now, at least.
The beauty of the FWB arrangement, in my humble, possibly unpopular opinion, is its blissful lack of obligation. It’s a delightful dance.
It’s about enjoying the present. It’s about mutual respect for each other’s autonomy. It’s about having fun without the baggage. And if that means I’ve been to other galaxies? Well, then I’ve got more stories to tell. Stories that might even make Sparky laugh. And that, my friends, is a win-win situation.
So, was it a yes? Was it a no? Maybe it was a more of a “yes, and also, look at the stars!” kind of answer. The world may never know. But Sparky seemed to get it. And that’s all that matters in this particular, delightful FWB universe.